While Bohemian at the core of my being, even I lose track of the fact that it’s a state of inner being. Admittedly, it is very often reflected outwardly as well. In fact, anyone truly Bohemian at heart will have experienced some form of degradation. Most of my life has been lived less than comfortably, both literally & monetarily. No surprise that the latter typically causes the former.
Is finally having a nice apartment, not to mention working for a corporation, a betrayal of my true self? Ironically, it’s the means of remaining true to myself. We have to choose our evils of this world. Honestly, selling out would have been Blockbusted, whereas Hollywood provides a job I enjoy within a construct I can respect. For the truth of the matter is that I have the wherewithal to (as Grandma still says ;->) truly “be anything” but, fortunately, not the willingness.
Not struggling from paycheck to paycheck is still the dream yet not one worth just ANY price. I have to actually enjoy what I do *and* have a modicum of freedom to be myself in the process. So, the true Bohemian life is to do just enough within the confines of ‘civilized’ living to enable yourself to go on living a life you grok. Thus the nice apartment, as the previous hits & misses were all part of the journey. A necessary journey en route to finding another piece of the puzzle that is ultimately me being me.
Simplistically, what’s the struggle for if not to improve one’s life bit by bit. Moreover, the inability to conform, by definition, takes no particular form. I do not live a life less than typically successful in order to disconnect from a homogenized, greedy world. Instead, I am unable to be typically successful due to the inability to connect to such homogenized greed. Bottom line, the determination to be oneself is one that actually does come at all costs.
(_)> “To Days Of Inspiration,
Playing Hookey, Making Something
Out Of Nothing, The Need
To Express -
To Communicate,
To Going Against The Grain,
Going Insane,
Going Mad” – Mark in ‘Rent’
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Here Here!!
She had just seen “RENT” when she posted this folks, so she was in a very bohemian sort of mood. I was just hoping we wouldn’t have to move to New York’s East Village and get a loft.
Turns out my fears are for naught! I’m happy you’re happy with our current digs, my darlin’. Those lofts look like they’re pretty cold
Silly man, tis called relating! One does not get ‘in the mood’ to be who they already are!? ;->
Thank you, thank you, Leann!
*cheers* |_|)
I know you posted this almost a year ago, but I recently found your blog via rhodester, who sent me a link to his last night.
I find it utterly amazing that we met by chance, and that my focus would have been what it was at the time!
Here’s hoping we can get to know each other better…